Crime and Punishment

Crime and Punishment

Our children are out of control and we ask "Why?".

Proverbs 21:11

When a mocker is punished, the simple gain wisdom; when a wise man is instructed, he gets knowledge.

Recently I read where several parents sued to stop a school from punishing their children for rank acts of misbehavior. They said it would hurt their childrens self-esteem if they were punished. The parents were afraid that punishment would lower their child's self-esteem. They are fools.

I have to ask what fool gave these parents this silly and absurd idea. Children want to be punished. There, I said it, children want to be punished. Not because they are some kind of masochists, that they enjoy pain and suffering. No children want to be punished because they want limits in their lives. They want to know what is right and what is wrong and, more often than you can guess, the only way to find out if something is wrong is to do it and get punished.

Further self-esteem requires self discipline. A person with no self-discipoine will have low self-esteem. Self-discipline starts with parental discipline, e.g. discipline from ones elders.

Proverbs 23:13-14

Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die.

Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.

So what happens when we fail to punish our children for wrong behavior. Well, for one thing, it lowers their self-esteem! Huh?, didn't we just say some parents sued to keep their children from being punished because punishment would lower their self-esteem. Common sense would dictate that telling a child they did something wrong would have an adverse effect on their self-esteem.

Yet, lots of children over the past several thousand years have been punished. The punishment did not appear to significantly lower their self-esteem. Do you think Abraham Lincoln or George Washington were punished as children (you can bet the bank they were!). They had pretty high self-esteem.

So how does a lack of punishment lower self-esteem? It tells the child they are worthless. It tells them that the two most important people in their lives do not care enough about them to teach them right from wrong. The lack of punishment, the lack of limits, tells the child his or her parents do not consider them worthy!

Hebrews 12:5-7

And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,

because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?

Show your children you love them, set limits on their behavior and punish them when they transgress.

Amen